Now I love going to the cinema, in fact I would probably say it’s one of my favourite hobbies. However there are certain things that happen at the cinema that just infuriate me, the thing is every single one of these has actually happened to me before. I’m listing them as it just easier:

  • Coming in late – yes the film usually doesn’t start for another 20 minutes after the time shown. So that gives you another 20 minutes. Don’t walk in 30-40 minutes late and disturb everyone in the show because you never learned how to tell the time.
  • Taking your phone out – every single cinema asks you not to do it, so why do it? Yes you’ve turned it on to vibrate so no one can hear it but then you feel it go off in your pocket and take it out to look at it. It lights the entire cinema up, everyone can literally see you’ve taken your phone out because there suddenly there’s a spot light at your seat. Idiot!
  • Sitting next to people when it’s empty – okay you might have booked your seats, and want to sit in them. But if you come and the cinema has 25 people in there why do you feel the need to sit next to someone. Sit on your own. The worst experience of this was when 2 fellas came in with their 2 sons and sat right in between two couples at the back when there was literally 25 empty rows.
  • Falling asleep and snoring – okay this really happened. Falling asleep is one thing as you might have had a busy day or just really tired. But then snoring, are you kidding me? I once physically had to shake someone to wake them up because I couldn’t hear the film just him counting Zs. I was livid, he apologised then fell back asleep and did it again. I nearly threw his drink over him. If you know you snore, please don’t fall asleep. If you can’t help it, don’t go to the cinema.
  • Being in the wrong seats – okay we’re all guilty of sitting in a different seat than whats on the ticket. But don’t complain when you get asked to move because you generally are in the wrong seats. Book in advance or get there early so you actually get a decent seat. Stop moaning!
  • Talking – I’m surprised this needs to be said, but it does. Don’t chat crap throughout the film. If you’re going to do that go home and watch a movie. Don’t even comment, pack that in too. I was once sat next to an old woman when watching Casino Royale. Every time Daniel Craig came on screen, yes he’s in it a lot he plays Bond, she went “ohh yeah, mmmm, that’s nice”. For Gods sake Shut Up!
  • Visiting the bathroom 20 times when you’re sat in the middle – seriously if you have a weak bladder sit on the end or don’t buy the gallon soft drink at the counter. Even better do both, that way you don’t disturb anyone.
  • Not telling your children to shut up – I know children get restless and start talking but if you don’t tell them they can’t talk they’ll never learn. Just tell them it’s not hard, if you don’t I will!
  • Slurping throughout the film – I love getting an milkshake, most of the time it’s gone before the film starts and yes it gets slurped at the end. But only when the film hasn’t started. If it has started I spoon it out or actually drink without the straw. Please stop your slurping throughout the entire film. Most of the time it’s kids, so parents take note, I will humiliate you if you don’t tell your kids to stop slurping. Give them a fruit shoot so you they don’t have to make that ridiculous noise, or make them finish it before the film starts.
  • Bringing kids to inappropriate films or times – this happened only about a week and go and it infuriated me. These 2 dads I assume, brought their kids to a film. First of all they came 10 minutes late so didn’t get there till 8:30 pm, it was a Friday,  which is very late for these kids, they must have only been 4 or 5. Not only this, the film was a 12A, surely there must be a lower limit to the 12A restriction as these kids really shouldn’t have been watching this film. The entire way through the film the kids were restless, talking, getting up on the seats on to their dads knees, saying that they were scared and wanting to go home. Let’s just think about the type and time of the film before you take your kids to it. Think, is this appropriate? Should I wait till it comes out on DVD and watch in the comfort of our own home rather than disturb everyone else cinema experience?

So there we have it, the things that really annoy me about going to the cinema. Hopefully people will read this and think twice before annoying other cinema goers.

Now to look and see what’s next on at the cinema. Already booked Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol 2, midnight screening, heres hoping none of the above take place.

Rant over!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.